What drives you? Have you ever given a thought on this? I believe our emotions are the primary driving force behind our behavior. Our feelings decide how we conduct ourselves, because depending on the most dominant emotions we are experiencing, our energy surges or diminishes. The same person who is overflowing with abundant energy due to positive emotions can be devoid of energy and drive when under the influence of negative emotions.
We are what we think and with our thinking we make our world, so in order to make our life beautiful, it is imperative that we develop positive thinking. Though all kinds of thoughts can take birth, we can train our brains to let only positive thoughts and emotions to take root. For increasing the quality of your life make conscious efforts to nip in bud the following negative emotions:
Fear is a very common emotion and can range from a less intense feeling of panic to dread to very intense terror. Fear in itself is a survival technique employed by the brain to avoid anticipated unpleasant situations. This is very much required feeling to prevent people from getting into dangerous situations and potential harm. It gives an indication to us to be more cautious.
You don’t have to ignore fear but unreasonable amount of fear will also prevent you from taking up challenges that are required for growth. Accept this feeling and prepare for the steps you need to take to deal with this situation effectively. Have faith and remember as Tony Robbins says “Most fears in life rarely come to fruition”.
Anger is a completely normal human emotion of annoyance or displeasure that is used as a protective mechanism to cover up fear or sadness. From a lower intensity irritation it may be as intense as rage. If fear would make a danger seem bigger than it actually is, anger does the opposite. It will make danger smaller and actions less risky and may lead to reckless behaviors.
You get angry when you want to stop the threatening behavior from outside or feel that your rules or standards are not being followed by others. By being angry you want to communicate to others about this violation and this aggression may at times be helpful if others have knowingly done the wrongs.
But you need to remember uncontrolled anger negatively affects the personal and social equations. You need to understand that what is violation of your personal standards could be perfectly normal for the other person or they might not have done it deliberately. Try to convey your feelings calmly and may be many would understand your view.
Frustration is the feeling of being upset due to various roadblocks and difficulties in life. When we are unable to change or achieve something, circumstances that keep us away from our success despite our continuous efforts tend to make us frustrated.
Frustration is simply a more intense negative emotion than dissatisfaction which is very much required for personal growth. If we are complacent and satisfied about our current position in life then it will be a deterrent to improvements and growth.
When frustrated realize that this feeling is indicating to you that you need to change your ways to get results. Brainstorm, change your approach and take help of others who have already achieved what you want to achieve. Many a time we just need to step back and see all the possibilities from a different perspective and we will be able to find solution to our challenges.
At some point of time in our lives, we all experience the feeling of sadness. Failures, pain, disappointments and losses, all make us sad. Feeling of sadness tells us that what we were really going after will probably be never achieved, and now it is a time that we changed our goals. In such situations you need to keep in mind that if something is delayed, it doesn’t mean that it is denied.
Sadness is an important emotion that reminds us what matters to us. We realize the value of our goal and the pain that is associated when it is not fulfilled. We need to learn from the situation, chart a new route to achieve our goal or may be set an all-together new and higher goal.
A very big warning bell that is needed to be sounded out here is to differentiate sadness and depression. Depression is the most severe stage of sadness with associated feeling of being helpless and with nothing to look forward in life.
Loneliness is one of the worst negative feelings. This is the feeling that makes you feel alone and separate from others. It indicates that nobody cares for you. Loneliness is worst than severe poverty. You probably are missing your friends and have no company to share your achievements with.
Just change your thought pattern and see that there are caring people all around. Think carefully whether you are alone or lonely. Simplest steps that you can take to change your status is that you need to open up, reach out and connect with others around you.
At last we need to remember that all emotions are normal, healthy and required. These negative emotions make us more alive and make all our relations, achievements and possessions valuable. To deal with such negative emotions, it is required that we lower their intensity. Start thinking, ‘it’s just that you are in a state of bad mood and that these feelings are temporary’. To correct bad mood see: 8 Ways to improve your Mood
Offer your brain empowering messages about your emotions and change yourself. Start accepting your emotions consciously and realize that it is not very desirable to contradict any feelings. Remember when you suppress your negative emotions you lose the appreciation of your emotions of love, passion or desire. You need to value these so called negative feelings and at the same time not to dwell on them and feel victimized.
Finally keep in mind that emotions are like waves, they come and go back. Keep a check on them and they will provide beauty and meaning to life but if left unchecked they can be destructive. In the end YOU ARE THE MASTER.
Also read: 9 Most Powerful Positive Emotions